Got my lunch packed up! My shoes tied tight! I hope I don't get in a fight!

It's always such an accomplishment to successfully complete your first week of school without wanting to rip your hair out! Being in college is still very much like the first day of middle school. You spend more time than necessary getting ready and picking out the perfect first day of school outfit. You want to get to to school extra early because the mere thought of getting lost and being late for class makes you want to puke. So, you pull into the parking lot a whole hour before class starts, pull out your schedule and make 100% sure you're parked on the right side of the building, you know EXACTLY where your class is (if you're like me, you print out a map of the school just in case), and place it neatly back into your planner, safe and sound. So you look around, noticing you may or may not be the only on in the parking lot sitting in their car, so you pull out the book you keep in your purse (don't lie.. I'm not the only one!). You'll read two, three pages max because you're WAYY too anxious to concentrate. On your way to class, you try not to make any eye contact with any passing classmates, in fear that someone might sense your anxiety. Once you find your class, and before entering the room, you triple check your schedule to be certain you're in the right spot. Take a deep breath, walk in a make a b-line to a seat that's definitely not in the front, but not too far in the back. As you sit there, pretending to read your book or check your cell phone for any texts you might have missed in the past three seconds, the hero comes in. The one that asks the question that everyone else is too chicken to ask but the same question that's burning in the back of your mind... "Is this G211? Public Speaking??"... the second bravest person in the room is the girl sitting in the front... "It sure is!"... with an obvious faked confidence. And so the first day of school begins, and as the anxiety finally starts to wear down, it's time for your next class and it starts all over again! Or maybe this is just me...

It was a very long week of full of new experiences and new friends. I can't wait to do it all over again Monday, but I'm so thankful for having Fridays off!! I hope you had an awesome week and looking forward to a relaxing weekend! I love you all more than you know!
Forever His,
EmilyJo

Disturb us, Lord

Disturb us, O Lord
when we are too well-pleased with ourselves
when our dreams have come true because we
dreamed too little, because we sailed too close to the shore.

Disturb us, O Lord
When with the abundance of things we possess,
we have lost our thirst for the water of life
when, having fallen in love with time,
we have ceased to dream of eternity
and in our efforts to build a new earth,
we have allowed our vision of Heaven to grow dim.

Stir us, O Lord
to dare more boldly, to venture into wider seas
where storms show Thy mastery,
where losing sight of land, we shall find the stars.

In the name of Him who pushed back the horizons of our hopes and invited the brave to follow.
Amen.

This morning, on my to church at 7:30 the world was covered in fog. As I drove, thinking to myself just how early it was, and how I got a total of two hours of sleep last night and how I wasn't ready to sing this morning. And then I realized that I couldn't even see the cars around me due to the fog that seemed to be swallowing everything in its path. I couldn't see the stop light until I was right on it, and I began to get scared. I was so busy worrying about silly things instead of the road and instead of what was happening around me. It reminded me of how often I let the fogs of this life engulf me and take me off course. How many times have gotten comfortable in that fog and didn't really care to see what was around me, so my prayer today is that God would disturb me. That I would not let myself get comfortable in this life.

Anyways, just a thought! School starts back up this week... I'm a little nervous... I feel like I'm in 7th grade all over again! I love you all more than you know!
Forever His,
EmilyJo

I Fall to the Ground, Cause I Want to be Better...

There's a little girl at Phoenix Children's' Hospital battling the most aggressive type of brain tumor possible. She's just six years old, and should be enjoying birthday parties and first grade. Along with annoying her older sister and making sure her little brother gets his fair share. That's the normal life of a 6 year, however, for Kate it's drastically different. On a daily basis, sweet little Kate, struggles with vomiting, chemo, restlessness, pain everywhere.. the list goes on and on. Would you join me in fervently praying that God would send His healing and peace to her little body? For her parents, comfort, love and wisdom? Pray that it would all be over soon, and Kate would be cancer free! Here's her blog. Check it out! I dare you to look at her pictures and read her story and not be broken!

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/mcraekate

I hope you're having an awesome week! I love you all more than you know!
Forever His,
EmilyJo

Where the Streets are Paved With Gold...

Today, I start my last week at my job! It's totally bittersweet, because I wasn't prepared to leave. I left for Christmas break, expecting to come back for another semester, but God had different plans. Starting next Tuesdays I'll be at school all day! The joys of college I suppose. I'm so excited to start this new chapter with a new major, however I'm going to miss all my crazy kiddos!

I started the week of with a very hard meeting! We had to terminate one of kids. It was a meeting with all kinds of people and the unanimous decision was that it would be in our better interest and the interest of the rest of the kids if he didn't return. It was a hard conversation to have, but it just reminded me of God's love for us and His discipline. I mean, even though it didn't work out with this little boy and his mom, how often should God just write us off? How many times have I misbehaved or ran and dumped off a table and ran away from Him, just because it was easier or because we like to show off our own talents and gifts and forget exactly where those came from.

How often should God say to me, "You know, EmilyJo, It's just not working out. I've got to go in a different direction and I just can't keep you"?? That's kind of harsh, but it's reality. I don't deserve Him. But what's so awesome about Him, is He doesn't say those things! He never even thinks them! And why? Because He loves me that much! What a humbling realization, that God doesn't need us to sing to Him, or worship Him or follow, but He allows us to, and He desires us to! I've just really been captivated by that lately!

"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Hebrews 12:11

In other news, I've been reading through the book of Matthew, and it has been incredible! It's like reading a really good novel that you have to force yourself to put down! Even though I know what's going to happen, I find myself on the edge of my seat in anticipation of what Jesus is going to say next and what dumb thing the disciples are going to doubt! It's just so great!

So I've been struggling a lot with my summer plans. Where should I go? I've had a few opportunities arise in the passing weeks, and I couldn't seem to pick exactly which one I wanted to go on, and which one I felt the Lord would want for me. I mean, I know any way I chose would be so blessed. I guess my thinking is that I don't want to miss out on anything. But the conclusion I've come to is that no matter where I go, no matter who I'm with, it can be amazingly blessed and God WILL do incredible things through me! My New Year's Resolution is to start having the mind set that everything is going to be great, because God doesn't do anything less. It may hurt, it may be long and hard, but it's going to turn out great! I'll leave you with a scripture that's really helped me with the decision of where to go this summer... stayed tuned for my final decision! You're going to want to get in on what God's doing!

"But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain."
1 Corinthians 15:57-58

I hope this finds you having a great Monday! And I pray that you're letting Christ romance you today! I love you all more than you know!
Forever His,
EmilyJo

Anticipating something big!

Lord Move, or Move Me

I can't find the words to pray
I'm a little down today
Can you help me?
Can you hold me?
I feel like a million miles away
And I don't know what to say
Can you hear me anyway?
What I need is for you to reach out your hand
You have taught me
No matter what you'd understand

CHORUS:

Lord move in a way, that I've never seen before
Cause there's a mountain in the way and a lock on the door
I'm drifting away, waves are crashing on the shore
So Lord move (move), or move me.


I've look every where to find
A simple peace of mind
I can't find nothing on my own
So I got to leave myself behind
Take up this cross of mine
Give away everything I hold onto

Lord I know the only way is through this
Lord I know I need you to help me do this

CHORUS

Lord move in a way, that I've never seen before
Cause there's a mountain in the way and a lock on the door
I'm drifting away, waves are crashing on the shore
So Lord move (move), or move me.

Out of this place of complacency
To a place of fellowship with thee
Cause I am weak but Lord you are so strong
And you know it's been way too long (been way too long)

Lord move in the way, that I've never seen before
Cause there's a mountain in the way and I'll knock on the door
I'm drifting away, waves are crashing on the shore
So Lord move (move)...

~FFH

With a heavy heart...

Today we lay to rest Christopher Lane Drew. He was 26 years old. His funeral was one of the saddest ones I've ever experienced, but at the same time it was the most joyful one. Some words used to describe him were joyful, he never met a stranger and practice with great success The Fruits of the Spirit. As I sat in the congregation, in the back row of course, I couldn't help but think what people might say about me at my funeral. There wasn't a dry eye in the room as different witnesses of his life shared testimonies and stories of Chris. Son of Gary and Ann. Brother to Steffi and Abbey. Husband to Sarah. He was so loved by so many people. I think you could judge a person's life based on the things said at their funeral. Chris paid attention to small details. It was his mission to help everyone he saw. Everyone he met became an instant friend.

To the family- My heart is heavy, thinking about the position you're in. Saying goodbye to such a good man is bittersweet to say the least. We can rest assured that Chris is dancing with the angels, and praising Jesus face to face. I see him as lucky! He gets to actually bow at the throne of the Most High, where he will no longer have seizures, not longer have to take any kind of medication again, and he has become a flawless beautiful, healthy being. What a blessing these pictures are!

To the friends- You have some big shoes to fill. My prayer is that you wouldn't let his spirit and outlook on life end here. May you carry on his dreams and his heart through the rest of your days. May you feel him with you every step of the way.

And finally to Sarah- You know, when you're a little girl you dream of getting married. You dream of the flowers and the dress and the food and DJ, but most of all you dream about the man who will be standing at the other end of the isle. When you find him, you feel complete, and I can tell that's what Chris did for you. I didn't know him very well, but judging from the smile on both of your faces in your wedding pictures and by the way he was described today, I can tell you'll never be the same. You never once picture your wedding to be just a short year before your husband's funeral, but I choose to believe this situation will turn out great. God doesn't do anything that isn't great. So right now, it hurts and your whole life is now turned completely upside down, but in the end it's going to be great. It may be a year from now or it may be ten years from now. But God has you in His grip. He has you right where He wants you. I fervently pray that His hand would guide you, and His love would pour an abundance of peace and grace over you. God doesn't bring us to anything we can't handle. I can't imagine going through this, but you're not alone. Praying for you daily!

My heart is heavy tonight, however, I rejoice in the fact that Chris is now with his Savior, eternally! Praise be to Him!

Pray for Sarah and her family, along with the Drew family. They are in desperate need of the comfort that only comes from the Body! May the Lord be their everything now. May they lean on Him!

Make sure you hug your loved ones extra tight tonight! I love you all more than you know!
Forever His,
EmilyJo

To those who hurt...

It seems like all you hear these days is about a world that's falling apart. I'm sitting here, watching the news, and I keep finding myself wanting to change the channel, but I can't bring myself to do it. A little boy was killed in a house fire, a mobile home park has been without water for weeks, terrioists... the list goes on and on and the one thing they all have in common is hurt. A great friend of mine lost her brother-in-law just yesterday. He was married to her sister for a year.



The question that always comes to mind when tragedy strikes is "Why?". Why did this happen? Why us? Why them? Then the questions of "what?" comes along. What did I do to deserve this? What happened to for richer or poor? What happens now?



Grieveing, though it comes in many forms, can be solved in one way. Relying on Christ. I know, I know, easier said than done! Man, sometimes it's just so easy to turn to other things, for example, drinking. How much easier is it to just surrender to Christ, and let Him take care of everything? Jesus says,

"Come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

Matthew 11:28.

So if Jesus says to come, why don't we come? Why don't we run? If I had a nickel for every time someone told me to rely on Christ for something, I would be rich! I'm so stubborn sometimes! I want to figure things out on my own. I want to feel accomplished when I figure something out. I want the attention to be on me. No thanks, God! I've got this one! So many of us have this mentality. You know, the one where we keep Jesus in a little box only to be taken out when we REALLY need Him, when we feel guilty or just can't get it together. Who are we to put restrictions on God? "No God! Last time I gave you control, it didn't turn out the way I wanted, so this time, I'm doing it! I can live without you! I can make my own decisions!" I wish I could tell you I've never even thought these words. I wish I could say I didn't know this lesson from experience, but I do. I, like most, have been through my share of hard times, and yet I still never learn.

I guess what I'm trying to say, is run! Run to Him as fast as you can, let Him pick you up, hold you, and send you down a path that is better. So, if this finds you hurting or angry or frustrated at your current situation, I challenge you to run! He's so worth it.

I hope you're doing well. I love you all more than you know!
Forever His,

EmilyJo